pockets of hope.

2011-09-13T22:15:00.001-04:00

in case you come here and wonder why i haven't posted in so long, i've created a photo tumblr: http://kellycatherinekee.tumblr.com/

enjoy : )

the quiet of our own being.

2010-06-26T10:09:00.002-04:00

[It is useless to try to make peace with ourselves by being pleased with everything we have done. In order to settle down in the quiet of our own being we must learn to be detached from the results of our own activity. We must withdraw ourselves, to some extent, from effects that are beyond our control and be content with the good will and the work that are the quiet expression of our inner life. We must be content to live without watching ourselves live, to work without expecting an immediate reward, to love without an instantaneous satisfaction, and to exist without any special recognition.

Our Christian destiny is, in fact, a great one: but we cannot achieve greatness unless we lose all interest in being great. For our own idea of greatness is illusory, and if we pay too much attention to it we will be lured out of the peace and stability of the being God gave us, and seek to live in a myth we have created for ourselves. It is, therefore, a very great thing to be little, which is to say: to be ourselves. And when we are truly ourselves we lose most of the futile self-consciousness that keeps us constantly comparing ourselves with others in order to see how big we are.]

-thomas merton.

You are with me.

2010-05-18T09:54:00.002-04:00

psalm 23.

the Lord is my shepherd.

i shall not want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures.

He leads me beside quiet waters.

He restores my soul.

He guides me in paths of righteousness

for His name's sake.

even though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death

i will fear no evil,

for You are with me.

Your rod and staff,

they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me,

in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil.

my cup overflows.

surely goodness and love will follow me

all the days of my life.

and i will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

wedding ideas. part 7.

2010-05-13T12:53:00.006-04:00

a beautiful dress:

hoping we can find a tandem to ride away on!:

the bottom picture has some cute birds on the table:

i really like the dessert set-up for all of the various pies and desserts we'll have:

(i don't know if i like the word "sweet")

oh and i really like her little sweater that she has on for the reception.

love the tree stumps, cool bottles & vases, and assortment of flowers:

love this dresser/table with the flower set-up:

really love the little canvas bags with that design.

and we're going to need to clothespin some photos everywhere:

love the books as centerpieces:

love the old drawers to hold the silverware:

would love to find a typewriter to use as the guest book:

some more wonderful decorations (like the windows hanging):

2010-04-26T22:40:00.001-04:00

[ in order to defend ourselves against agitation, we must be detached not only from the immediate results of our work - and this detachment is difficult and rare - but from the whole complex of aims that govern our earthly lives. we have to be detached from health and security, from pleasures and possessions, from people and places and conditions and things. we have to be indifferent to life itself, in the Gospel sense, living like the lilies of the field, seeking first the Kingdom of Heaven and trusting that all our material needs will be taken care of into the bargain. ]

thomas merton.

no man is an island.

a reminder of things.

2010-04-21T19:17:00.002-04:00

all excerpts/thoughts/notes from No Man is an Island by Thomas Merton:

[the life of the interior self is so often smothered under the ashes of anxiety and futile concern.

without a life of the spirit, our whole existence becomes unsubstantial and illusory.

anxiety is the mark of spiritual insecurity. a far worse insecurity comes from being afraid to ask the right questions.

the discovery of Christ is never genuine if it is nothing but a flight from ourselves.

to live in hope is to live in poverty, having nothing.

hope deprives us of everything that is not God, in order that all things may serve their true purpose as means to bring us to God.

it is better to find God on the threshold of despair than to risk our lives in a complacency that has never felt the need of forgiveness.

what is most important: to see the value and the beauty in ordinary things, to come alive to the splendor that is all around us in the creatures of God.

the man who can face such dryness and abandonment for a long time, with great patience, and ask nothing more of God but to do His holy will and never offend Him, finally enters into pure prayer.

pure prayer only takes possession of our hearts for good when we no longer desire any special light or grace or consolation for ourselves, and pray without any thought of our own satisfaction.]

to be continued...

dream life.

2010-04-21T15:36:00.002-04:00

a photo shoot by the wonderful, tec petaja.

if only those images were my life...

wedding ideas. part 6.

2010-04-13T17:12:00.005-04:00

i'm hoping to find a simple dress. and i'd like to make a flower belt like this to go with it.

love this big open feel.

LOVE these shoes. i'm hoping to find a pair of cute yellow flats to wear.

i've seen this idea a lot and i really like it. i'm hoping to pin up a bunch of photos of us, along with our friends and family.

i like using these buckets as centerpieces. and maybe for the flower girl.

just another cute photo with a mason jar.

hoping to find a bunch of these to use for centerpieces and drinking glasses.

[kenda, how crazy is this! i can't believe someone else had those pencils in their wedding.]

also, i'd love to have jugs of sweet tea and lemonade.

two or three things i know for sure.

2010-04-12T20:33:00.003-04:00

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that everyone has a story.

a story worth telling.

a story worth listening to.

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that empowerment and affirmation

can only be found within yourself.

your identity is not found in the labels

the world has stitched into your clothes.

and it is not contained to the boxes the world has limited you to.

your identity is your own.

and it runs across borders.

it deconstructs labels and reconstructs truth.

it blurs the lines of boxes.

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that when you withhold love from others,

you are only hurting yourself.

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that life is not about the body.

it is not about the skin we are in.

but, it is about the heart.

the spirit.

the soul.

all of which are always trying to find their way home. to Love.

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that Love wins. always.

even when the dark gets darker.

even when the Light seems to have faded away.

even when you can't even remember what Hope feels like.

what Faith feels like.

even when the world's illusion of power becomes overwhelming.

even when you feel smothered by the lies of society.

Love wins.

always.

for giving.

2010-04-08T22:05:00.002-04:00

i've been re-reading "traveling mercies" by anne lamott,

and man is it breaking me. again.

here's some stuff from the chapter "forgiveness."

[if you want to be forgiven, if you want to experience that kind of love,

you have to forgive everyone in your life -- everyone, even the very worst boyfriend you ever had -- even, for God's sake, yourself.

forgiveness means that God is for giving,

and that we are here for giving too,

and that to withhold love or blessings is to be completely delusional.

God loves us exactly the way we are,

and God loves us too much to let us stay like this.

i read once in some magazine that in czechoslovakia, they say an echo in the woods always returns your own call, and so i started speaking sweetly to everyone ... and my sweet voice started getting all over me, like sunlight ... ]

2010-04-01T09:30:00.001-04:00

[the salvation of the righteous comes from the Lord;

He is their stronghold in time of trouble.

the Lord helps them and delivers them;

He delivers them from the wicked and saves them,

because they take refuge in Him.]

-psalm 37:40

wedding ideas. part 5: some more cute things.

2010-03-27T09:57:00.002-04:00

i just like old windows used as decoration:

some more flower arrangements that i like:

mason jars hanging from trees, again. i just can't get enough:

maybe some homemade jam & apple butter for gifts:

my most favorite wedding (photos) ever.

2010-03-25T21:33:00.003-04:00

http://blog.benblood.com/2010/03/22/emilycolby-a-wild-west-wedding/

here's some photos, but you should check out this link to see them all.

the wedding is absolutely incredible.

and the photography is the best i've ever seen.

wedding ideas. part 4: things and such cont'd.

2010-03-19T14:54:00.003-04:00

this is a must. i LOVE this idea:

a nest ring pillow:

possible cake toppers?...

i'm trying to find the perfect center piece. we want everything in our wedding to be of some other use. i like this idea. a lot.

here's another wedding with a tree as the centerpiece:

wedding ideas. part 3: the attire.

2010-03-17T15:55:00.002-04:00

the dress - some of my favorite finds so far:

i like the sheer material. and layers.

i like these straps, the lace, and slender design.

i like this one the most. i'm just still not sure if i want a short or long dress.

lace is always elegant.

matching socks for the boys...so cute.

wedding ideas. part 2: things and such.

2010-03-17T15:49:00.004-04:00

i love this table setting:

maybe everyone can donate tableware for the night:

mason jars with flowers and tea lights, hanging from the trees is a must:

i like when the inside is out:

maybe we could find a quaint, old door for an entry way:

a bouquet of lavender would be quite nice:

or this one:

wedding ideas. part 1: location.

2010-03-17T15:40:00.003-04:00

hoping for a location somewhat like this:

or this:

and for the reception, something like this... maybe:

or this:

(and leaving on a tandem would be perfect.)

2010-03-16T20:48:00.000-04:00

You have sustained.

and You will continue to sustain.

may i never lose faith.

and always hope in You.

2010-03-03T10:51:00.001-05:00

[the only true joy on earth is to escape from the prison of our own false self, and enter by love into union with the Life Who dwells and sings within the essence of every creature and in the core of our own souls.]

-thomas merton

new seeds of contemplation.

2010-03-02T14:24:00.002-05:00

matthew 5:20-26

be reconciled to your brother.

look past others' shortcomings.

seek unity.

forgive.

let go of anger.

luke 6:36-38

"for with the measure you use,

it will be measured to you."

the more we empty ourselves and give to others,

the more we can receive from the Father.

2010-02-25T21:10:00.002-05:00

isaiah 58:1-9

"is not this the kind of fasting i have chosen:

to loose the chains of injustice

and untie the cords of the yoke,

to set the oppressed free

and break every yoke?

is it not to share your food with the hungry

and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter..."

open our eyes to the contradictions that are around and within us.

help us to see our own inconsistencies.

[teach us to live more simply so that we can share our resources with the unfortunate.

embolden us to give not just from our excess but from our substance.

remove the blinders that shield us from the hurt, need and loneliness all around us.

help us to see all your children as you see them, and to love them as you love them.]

thy kingdom come.

[Jesus taught us to ask the Father that his eternal, unshakable, heavenly kingdom be extended to our temporal, unstable, earthly lives.]

a beautiful morning.

2010-02-11T20:40:00.002-05:00

making an effort to become more aware of the earthly things that enslave me.

resisting them.

letting go of the fear of the unknown.

realizing that anxiety doesn't have to be real.

desiring to be free.

the education system.

2010-02-08T23:15:00.004-05:00

"the usual way that people are taught to think in amerika is that each subject is in a little compartment and has no relation to any other subject. for the most part, we receive fragments of unrelated knowledge, and our education follows no logical format or pattern. it is exactly this kind of education that produces people who don't have the ability to think for themselves and who are easily manipulated."

-assata shakur.

one day at a time.

2010-02-07T16:25:00.003-05:00

[the more one thinks of his eternal destiny, the more he will realize that his earthly life is a journey toward something far grander than this world. he sees each day as a step toward Heaven, and he looks at himself to see whether he is on the right path. slowly he comes to value the events of his daily life according to God's Will and Heaven's eternal happiness.]

Lord, help me to be thankful for where You have me right now.
help me to find value in my daily obligations.

blessed are the poor.

2010-02-07T12:52:00.005-05:00

[then Jesus said to his disciples, "i tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven."] - matthew 19:23

i have food.
and water.
and shelter.

i am rich.

it is hard for me to enter the kingdom of heaven.

i have heard these words before.
i know these words.
and yet i rarely think
woe is me, for i am rich.

[looking at his disciples, he said:
"blessed are you who are poor,
for yours is the kingdom of God.
blessed are you who hunger now,
for you will be satisfied.
blessed are you who weep now,
for you will laugh.
blessed are you when men hate you,
when they exclude you and insult you
and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man.

rejoice in that day and leap for joy,
because great is your reward in Heaven.
for that is how their fathers treated the prophets.
but woe to you who are rich,
for you have already received your comfort.
woe to you who are well fed now,
for you will go hungry.
woe to you who laugh now,
for you will mourn and weep.
woe to you when all men speak well of you,
for that is how their fathers treated the false prophets.] - luke 6:20-26

i will try this day.

2010-02-01T17:15:00.003-05:00

"i will try this day to live a simple, sincere and serene life, repelling promptly every thought of discontent, anxiety, discouragement, impurity and self-seeking; cultivating cheerfulness, magnanimity, charity, and the habit of holy silence; exercising economy in expenditure, generosity in giving, carefulness in conversation, diligence in appointed service, fidelity to every trust, and a childlike faith in God."

-bishop vincent.

[as your desire for spiritual perfection grows, you will find yourself thinking more definitely of Heaven. your desire for Heaven will become stronger and stronger. you may even have to control a dislike for the needs and obligations of daily life.

the more one thinks of his eternal destiny, the more he will realize that his earthly life is a journey toward something far grander than this world. he sees each day as a step toward Heaven, and he looks at himself to see whether he is on the right path. slowly he comes to value the events of his daily life according to God's Will and Heaven's eternal happiness.]

difference.

2010-02-01T17:12:00.001-05:00

[let us love not only our sameness

but our unsameness.

in our difference is our strength.

let us be not for ourselves alone

but also for that other

who is our deepest self.]

-leonard peltier.

forgiveness.

2010-02-01T17:09:00.001-05:00

[let us forgive the worst among us

because the worst is in ourselves,

the worst lives in each of us,

along with the best.

let us forgive the worst

in each of us

and all of us

so that the best

in each of us

and all of us

may be free.]

-leonard peltier.

reassurance.

2010-01-25T17:53:00.002-05:00

[i must love the questions

themselves

as Rilke said

like locked rooms

full of treasure

to which my blind

and groping key

does not yet fit.

and await the answers

as unsealed

letters

mailed with dubious intent

and written in a very foreign

tongue.

and in the hourly making

of myself

no thought of Time

to force, to squeeze

the space

I grow into.]

-alice walker.

amidst the turmoil that the questions may cause, i must realize that i am privileged to even have a choice.

a woman is not a potted plant.

2010-01-25T17:49:00.003-05:00

[a woman is not

a potted plant

her roots bound

to the confines

of her house

a woman is not

a potted plant

her leaves trimmed

to the contours

of her sex

a woman is not

a potted plant

her branches

espaliered

against the fences

of her race

her country

her mother

her man

her trained blossom

turning

this way

& that

to follow

the sun

of whoever feeds

and waters

her

a woman

is wilderness

unbounded

holding the future

between each breath

walking the earth

only because

she is free

and not creepervine

or tree.

nor even honeysuckle

or bee.]

-alice walker.

2010-01-25T13:22:00.002-05:00

[there are moments that we will remember always. we know this as they are happening. there is a subtle light around them. a feeling of a circle being closed. they have a sound that is distinct but indescribable, as they feed something old and weary, something hungry in the soul. there is an urge to laugh, though the joy is heavy with sorrow. they are moments, often, with a long history of longing behind them, of shared suffering and losses. moments that have, as well, memories of happiness, of triumph over evil, of solidarity with irrepressible warriors and a temporary distance from defeat.]

-alice walker.

2010-01-24T20:18:00.002-05:00

how easy it is to allow this world to blind me of the Truth.
to be thought of as unworthy.
how easy it is to believe all of the lies.
to ultimately not believe that Your love is good enough.

forgive me, Father.
for being wrapped up in myself.
for believing Satan's lies.
that i am not good.

it is by Your grace that i may repent today. and tomorrow. and the next day.
and be reconciled to You.

it is by Your grace that i am united with You by the Holy Spirit.

you are to be praised forever and ever.

2010-01-21T23:50:00.002-05:00

[our God in Heaven,
Hallowed be Thy name
above all names.
Your kingdom come;
Your will be done,
on earth as it is in Heaven.
give us today our daily bread.
forgive us weary sinners.
keep us far from our vices
and deliver us from these prisons.]

2010-01-20T21:54:00.002-05:00

today was a little bit harder than usual.
i'm anxious. i'm overwhelmed.

i can't seem to focus on the present.
and when i am, my thoughts are consumed with other places.
anywhere, but here and now.

i can't seem to catch a breath.

where is my heart?
where is my mind?

a friend reminded me of something today:
what consumes our mind and controls are heart is our god.

i'm thinking i should write that on my hand forever,
because i can go days, if not weeks, in this place and never once will that cross my mind.

i know i am here for a reason.
i know God is teaching me.
and changing me.
and breaking me.

but, i can't seem but think that this college lifestyle is only pulling me away from what my life should be centered on.
it definitely makes it harder.

to be told or pressured on a daily basis that your life should be concerned with grades, internships, careers and future plans has always been overwhelmingly discouraging.

Father, i know You're here.
i just need You more than ever.
i need You to draw me close.
i need You to protect me from the lies and confusion in this world.
and i need You to give me the desire to know and love You,
because it is more than obvious that i am weak and blinded without You.

thank You.

Thy will be done on earth, as it is in Heaven.

amen.

2010-01-12T22:30:00.004-05:00

2010-01-11T21:32:00.002-05:00

2010-01-10T21:48:00.002-05:00

[Lord, give me the courage to look at myself,
the honesty to admit my faults and limitations,
the sincerity to try self-improvement,
and the love for You that will keep me at it for the rest of my life.
Let me not be concerned about matters that are beyond my control,
except to petition Your help.
For the rest, let me really live the words:
"Thy will be done."
Amen.]

-prayer from my daily bread.

gainesville bucket list.

2010-01-07T21:18:00.002-05:00

1. one more afternoon spent at the farmer's market.

2. a day spent laying in the grass at plaza.

3. book lover's cafe.

4. brunch at the top.

5. many mornings and afternoons on my porch.

6. some biscuits and gravy & rancheros at the jones.

7. bike rides around the wonderful neighborhoods of northeast gainesville.

8. tempeh pizza in the treehouse at satchel's.

9. fires in my fireplace.

10. coffee in my living room.

11. a sunset and/or sunrise at paynes prairie.

12. a day spent in micanopy.

13. a sunday afternoon spent at the mosswood farmer's market.

to be continued...

prayer for the mind of Christ.

2010-01-07T10:47:00.002-05:00

"O Lord, our Christ, may we have Thy mind and Thy spirit;
make us instruments of Thy peace;
where there is hatred, let us sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is discord, union;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where there is sadness, joy.

O Divine Master,
grant that we may not so much seek
to be consoled, as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
Amen."

-St. Francis of Assisi

a stranger in a strange land.

2009-12-25T23:46:00.003-05:00

i don't belong here.
here is not my home.
and although most times,
that can be confusing,
and frustrating,
and exhausting,

i am finding comfort in Your promise.

i am finding peace in Your mystery.

may i not be disheartened by those who don't understand me.
but, may i pray that they too would see Your glorious Light and Love.

poverty.

2009-12-24T13:56:00.002-05:00

"simple intention is a rare gift of God. rare because it is poor. poverty is a gift that few religious people really relish. they want their religion to make them at least spiritually rich, and if they renounce all things in this world, they want to lay hands not only on life everlasting but, above all, on the "hundredfold" promised to us even before we die.
actually, that hundredfold is found in the beatitudes, the first of which is poverty.
our intention cannot be completely simple unless it is completely poor. it seeks and desires nothing but the supreme poverty of having nothing but God. true, anyone with a grain of faith realized that to have God and nothing else besides is to have everything in Him. but between the thought of such poverty and its actualization in our lives lies the desert of emptiness through which we must travel in order to find Him."

-thomas merton.
[no man is an island]

i can almost breathe.

2009-11-16T15:36:00.002-05:00

good things are here.
good things are to come.

surprise visits from orlando friends.
neko case show.
wedding in tally.
reunions with tally friends.
a meal of thanks with dear friends.
cooler weather. (crossing my fingers)
long breaks from academia.
and a week spent loving haitian children as best as i can.

2009-11-11T00:10:00.001-05:00

americorps: new option for the future?...

in every season.

2009-11-08T22:22:00.005-05:00

[i know i'm filled to be emptied again.

the seed i've received i will sow.]

maggie: the little bearwolf.

2009-11-08T00:33:00.004-05:00

a friend of mine is fostering her until she's old enough to go to the shelter.
i wish i could've taken her home.
i'd really like a dog companion.

maybe next year.

a good conscience.

2009-11-05T22:27:00.002-05:00

saved through water.

baptism.

the pledge of a good conscience toward God.

"healthy contempt for worldly comforts,

burning desire to advance in virtue,

a love of right order in your actions,

a spirit of penance,

readiness to obey authority,

self-discipline,

and patience to bear adversity for My sake."

Lord, i don't know anything.

except for one thing.

You are God.

and i want to spend the rest of my life loving you.

may i always have faith.

always trust.

always hope.

and always love.

2009-11-04T23:36:00.001-05:00

let the morning bring word of Your unfailing Love.

i am on my knees, Father.

hold me in Your arms.

thankful to be growing. and learning.

2009-11-04T17:28:00.004-05:00

Father, you are to be praised!

i thank you entirely for the peace and hope that i have found in you, my Hope.

in the past 2 years,

you have strengthened me in so many ways.

and you have changed my heart.

no longer am i afraid of those things.

no longer am i insecure.

for my hope is in You.

my trust is in You.

i am Yours and there is nothing more beautiful than that.

chapter 2: sentences on hope.

2009-11-03T23:05:00.003-05:00

[Hope deprives us of everything that is not God, in order that all things may serve their true purpose as means to bring us to God.]

[Hope empties our hands in order that we may work with them.]

[All sin is rooted in the failure of love. All sin is a withdrawal of love from God, in order to love something else. Sin sets boundaries to our hope, and locks our love in prison.]

[It is better to find God on the threshold of despair than to risk our lives in a complacency that has never felt the need of forgiveness. A life that is without problems may literally be more hopeless than one that always verges on despair.]

[But I do not achieve the contact that knows Him, and thereby knows the Father in Him, until my faith in Him is completed by hope and charity:

hope that grasps His love for me

and charity that pays Him the return of love I owe.]

[Hope seeks not only God in Himself, not only the means to reach Him, but it seeks, finally and beyond all else, God's glory revealed in ourselves. This will be the final manifestation of His infinite mercy, and this is what we pray for when we say "Thy Kingdom come."]

excerpts from No Man is An Island: Thomas Merton.

deliver me, Father.

2009-11-03T15:45:00.007-05:00

i have posted this prayer once before, but it is still just as needed today. and its words are still just as powerful.

pry me off dead center.

Deepen my hurt
until I learn to share it
and myself
openly,
and my needs honestly.

Sharpen my fears
until I name them
and release the power I have locked in them
and they in me.

Accentuate my confusion
until I shed those grandiose expectations
that divert me from the small, glad gifts
of the now and the here and the me.

Expose my shame where it shivers,
crouched behind the curtains of propriety,
until I can laugh at last
through my common frailties and failures,
laugh my way toward becoming whole.

Deliver me
from just going through the motions
and wasting everything I have
which is today,
a chance,
a choice,
my creativity,
your call.

Let how much it all matters
pry me off dead center
so if I am moved inside
to tears
or signs
or screams
or smiles
or dreams,

they will be real
and I will be in touch with who I am
and who you are
and who my sisters and brothers are.

-Ted Loder, Guerrillas of Grace: Prayers for the Battle

2009-11-02T21:05:00.001-05:00

thank you for keeping my spirit alive, today.

one path.

2009-10-28T23:26:00.003-04:00

Father, take me where you want me to go.

i long to follow you.

let Your will be done.

and when i am led astray,

by my own selfish desires especially,

draw me in.

and set my eyes on You.

next year brings many possibilities. many paths.

help me to choose the one that will bring my soul closer to Yours.

the one that will bring glory to Your name.

the one that will bring heaven to earth.

amen.

wow, what a night.

2009-10-27T23:11:00.004-04:00

i thought i was going to spend my evening with some classmates at the alachua county fair, shooting photos for an assignment.

thankfully, the weather was terrible and we postponed it,

because i was now able to attend the UF Student Senate meeting instead.

and tonight, they were debating a resolution urging Aramark (a major food provider) to meet with the Coalition of Immokalee Workers.

i wasn't really sure what to expect; i had never been to a senate meeting before.

but, as soon as i arrived, i realized this was a far bigger deal than i had thought.

there were about 200 people there. half of which were UF senators.

immediately, it was brought to our attention that those of us who were there in solidarity with the CIW, were going to be there for quite some time.

one student senator mentioned that these meetings tend to go until 1 or 2 a.m. (it started at 7:30).

not to mention, the first motion made was to push our bill further into the meeting.

the first part was public debate, which was incredible!

so many people came out to support the resolution and say a few words.

it was incredibly frustrating though to watch a handful of people make snide comments and remarks under their breath or roll their eyes when students were speaking about the situation in Immokalee.

unfortunately, this one guy was directly in my line of vision.

and i am not proud to say that i spent a lot of my time being unbelievably angry with him.

i had to continually pray for a heart of mercy and grace.

thankfully, i didn't have to sit and listen to the first couple of bills, including funding for the gator skim club's special event. and yes, skim as in skimboarding.

(and no, i'm not even going to go on about how ridiculous it is that this was motioned to be debated before the CIW bill.)

a friend had brought wendell berry's "sex, freedom and economy," which was quite nice to read instead of dreadfully listening to funding for beach trips.

(i'll have to post some of berry's inspiring words later.)

anyways, about 3 hours later the CIW/Aramark resolution bill was brought to the floor for debate.

when it was previously debated in the past, a majority had voted for it, but a majority wasn't enough. we needed 2/3's of the vote.

so this time around, the debate was a fairly heated one.

several sponsors and authors of the bill began by presenting it to the senate once again.

next, was the question and answer section.

then the pros and cons.

all i could do was pray.

and pray.

i prayed unceasingly as students debated back and forth on whether or not we should support ending modern-day slavery.

i prayed that the Spirit would move in those whose hearts had been hardened.

i prayed that the Father would enlighten those whose minds had been conditioned.

i prayed that His will would be done.

i prayed for peace. and justice. and mercy.

after what had seemed like the longest debate i've ever witnessed,

the decision was made. 57 to 19.

we won!

i can't even begin to explain the joy that filled my insides.

it was a tiny, yet sweet victory. so sweet.

every man is a part of the main.

2009-10-27T00:09:00.002-04:00

"Every Christian is a part of my own body,

because we are members of Christ.

What i do is also done for them and with them and by them.

What they do is done in me and by me and for me."

-Thomas Merton

life of the spirit.

2009-10-25T19:31:00.002-04:00

being made aware of our own real selves.

and being placed in the presence of God.

discovering from within.

loving God.

loving others.

losing ourselves - a death and a resurrection.

[notes from No Man is An Island.]

justice in the fields.

2009-10-25T15:45:00.003-04:00

The Coalition of Immokalee Workers are taking their Campaign for Fair Food a step further. The farmers, along with the support of the Student Farmworker Alliance and local friends, rallied yesterday at the University of Florida. The CIW is currently calling upon Aramark (the university's food provider) and Publix to sign an agreement for fair wages for the farmers of Immokalee.

In the past, the CIW has successfully made agreements with Taco Bell, Burger King, McDonald's, Whole Foods, Subway, Compass Group and a few others.

They are asking for these corporations to pay the tomato farmers 1 cent more per lb. of tomatos. This may not seem like a lot to the average person, but it is a huge increase for the farmers' salaries.

They are also asking Publix and Aramark to sign an agreement requesting that they not do business with growers who partake in any form of modern-day slavery.

There have been many recorded cases of farmers being held against their will, beat, and chained up over night.

Not to mention the terrible conditions in which they are forced to live in.

Last night, a woman spoke of a two-room trailer with rodents and cockroaches. She said they typically put 7-8 people in each unit because they can't afford anything else.

Please, if you have any free time, use it to educate yourself a little more about this.

You can read all about their past and current struggles in the fight for fair food here.

i'll try to remind you.

2009-10-25T00:15:00.002-04:00

2009-10-20T17:52:00.002-04:00

without You, everything is pointless.

nothing of this world matters.
and too easily do i dwell in these things that are fleeting.

may i only be comforted by You.
nothing else.

for nothing can satisfy me, but You.

lift up my soul, oppressed by the weight of sin.

may i be honest enough to face my weaknesses.
deliver me, Father.

may i always be found in sanctifying grace.
for that is the only pathway to Heaven.

may You be love in me and through me.

amen.

short, but sweet few days.

2009-10-18T22:50:00.004-04:00

texas friends.

orlando friends.

new friends.

porches.

storms.

surprises.

roofs.

fires.

prairies.

farms.

gardens.

adventure.

fall.

cool weather.

fellowship.

hold on to what you know is true.

life is beautiful.

i am forever grateful, Father.

2009-10-14T00:44:00.001-04:00

all of my life.

in every season.

You are still God.

and so i will bring praise.

2009-10-07T14:57:00.002-04:00

it's funny how inconsistent our emotions can be sometimes.

i read something she wrote from last spring.

i felt overwhelmingly uneasy afterward.

i think it's because i can identify with her.

with her feelings. her words.

so much so, that i acquire her feelings now,

that she wrote down on paper then.

i hope her heart is better now.

my daily bread.

2009-10-07T11:57:00.002-04:00

[My child, the person who esteems anything for itself alone, forgetting My goodness and love, will always be small and inferior like the things which he values.]

[Let others seek whatever else they desire besides Me. As for you, let nothing please you except Me alone, your Hope, your Eternal Salvation.]

[No tongue can describe the peace which God gives to those who sincerely want His Will above all else.

Many never find this peace because they lack the trust and courage to live entirely God's way.]

Father, help me live each day, moment after moment, pleasing You.

help me to turn from everything and anything that displeases You.

help me to know Your will.

help me to love Your will.

Amen.

2009-10-06T22:02:00.003-04:00

new sleeping at last video.
it's beautiful. and amazing.

you should check it out.
you should.

the field.

2009-10-03T23:20:00.002-04:00

[...your fingers wrapped around me
and you cool me down
and i lay here as we're breathing
in rhythm now

and you hide me in your acres
in fields so green
no gravestones in the soil here
no choking weeds

lay me down there
while the sun's high in the sky
where the grass grows green and high

lay me down there
we'll share a common block of stone
just don't let me lay alone

maybe we'll have babies
and raise a family
and you tell me not to worry
because i will still be me

well i'll take you to the mountains
i will build a home
and you'll tend to the garden
kept in stone...]

-besides daniel.

can't get enough of them.

2009-10-01T23:33:00.002-04:00

2009-09-23T00:18:00.002-04:00

[weeping may remain for a night,

but rejoicing comes in the morning.]

O Lord, be my help.

[in the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. we do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.]

[but blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord,

whose confidence is in Him.

he will be like a tree planted by the water

that sends out its roots by the stream.

it does not fear when heat comes;

its leaves are always green.

it has no worries in a year of drought

and never fails to bear fruit.]

wishing i was somewhere deep in the mountains listening to this song:

2009-09-20T20:44:00.002-04:00

[love is handing your heart to someone and taking the risk that they will hand it back because they don't want it.

love is a giving away of power.

love is a giving away.

when we love,
we put ourselves out there,
we expose ourselves,
we allow ourselves to be vulnerable.

love is giving up control.

this is why God gives us free will.
His entire life is about the stripping away of power and control.

Jesus always chooses the path of love, not power.]

rob bell.

easy essays: logical and practical.

2009-09-19T22:14:00.002-04:00

What is not logical
is not practical,
even if it is practiced.
What is logical
is practical
even if it is not practiced.
To practice
what is not logical
though it is practical
is to be a bourgeois.
A bourgeois is a fellow
who tries to be somebody
by trying to be
like everybody,
which makes him
nobody.
To practice
what is logical
even if it is not practiced
is to be a leader.
A leader is a fellow
who follows a cause.
The Sermon on the Mount
will be called practical
when Christians make up their mind
to practice it.

:peter maurin.

2009-09-19T09:51:00.001-04:00

"But the final word is love. ... We have all known the long loneliness and we have learned that the only solution is love and that love comes with community."

:dorothy day.

tumbleweed houses.

2009-09-16T18:30:00.002-04:00

a good friend of mine showed me this today:

http://www.tumbleweedhouses.com/

you should check it out.

how awesome would it be if everyone's houses were this size?!

pry me off dead center.

2009-09-14T16:46:00.000-04:00

Deliver me from assuming that mercy is gentle.
Pressure me that I may grow more human,
not through the lessening of my struggles,
but through an expansion of them
that will undamn me
and unbury my gifts.

Deepen my hurt
until I learn to share it
and myself
openly,
and my needs honestly.

Sharpen my fears
until I name them
and release the power I have locked in them
and they in me.

Accentuate my confusion
until I shed those grandiose expectations
that divert me from the small, glad gifts
of the now and the here and the me.

Expose my shame where it shivers,
crouched behind the curtains of propriety,
until I can laugh at last
through my common frailties and failures,
laugh my way toward becoming whole.

Deliver me
from just going through the motions
and wasting everything I have
which is today,
a chance,
a choice,
my creativity,
your call.

Let how much it all matters
pry me off dead center
so if I am moved inside
to tears
or signs
or screams
or smiles
or dreams,

they will be real
and I will be in touch with who I am
and who you are
and who my sisters and brothers are.

-Ted Loder, Guerrillas of Grace: Prayers for the Battle

my heart is dancing.

2009-09-13T22:54:00.002-04:00

sunday adventure.

2009-09-13T22:47:00.003-04:00

went with some good friends on a little adventure to the nearby town, micanopy.

after grabbing lunch at blue highway pizza,

we stopped at the mosswood farm store.

it's such a cute spot with tons of organic, recycled stuff.

and the family that owns it and they are so sweet.

i'm pretty sure i'm going to do a photo story on them.

anyways, check out their web site.

a fine frenzy.

2009-09-12T11:44:00.007-04:00

2009-09-12T10:22:00.003-04:00

"If you wish to act as you should, and if you wish to make progress, think of yourself as a stranger on earth, as a pilgrim. You should become a fool for Christ if you wish to lead a religious life."

-Thomas à Kempis

2009-09-11T22:57:00.002-04:00

i need so much help, Father.

i am so anxious to be done with school.

i am so discontent, so often, with being in one place.

help me to have peace here in this place.

help me to be patient.

help me to accept that i am in school for a reason.

help me to not just go through the motions for my last year,

but to seek You and to love Your children here.

amen.

of what we are to do and say about all our desires.

2009-09-07T15:08:00.003-04:00

[My friend, speak about everything in this way: "Lord, if it is pleasing to you, let this be done. Lord, if it is to your honor, let this be done in your name. Lord, if you see that it will help me and if you judge it to be useful, then grant me this to use for your honor. But, if you know it to be harmful for me and of no help saving my soul, then take this desire away from me."

"Lord, you know what is best. Let this or that be done as you wish. Give what you want, how much you want and when you want. Do with me as you think best and as best pleases you and in a way which will give you greater honor. Put me where you want me and use me freely. I am in you hand; turn me around whichever way you will. See! I am your servant, ready for anything. Since it is so, I do not wish to live for myself, but for you. Would that I could live only for you, fittingly and flawlessly!"

prayer that God's will be done:

Most kind Jesus, grant me your grace so that it may be with me and work with me and remain with me to the end. Grant me this: always to desire and to want what is most acceptable and pleasing to you. Let your will be mine, and let my will always follow yours and be in perfect accord with it. Let what I want always be what you want, and let me not want anything that you do not want.

Grant that nothing in the world might be as important to me as you are, and for your sake grant that I may serve you with deep humility and love, caring little for recognition or honor. Grant above all else, that I may rest in you and that my heart may find peace in you. You are the heart's true peace; you are its only rest. Apart from you everything is hard and uneasy. Only in this peace that is you, highest and eternal Good, do I find sleep and take my rest. Amen.]

Thomas à Kempis

2009-09-04T09:55:00.000-04:00

really beautiful video.
[unfortunately, it's an advertisement.]

more pockets of hope.

2009-09-03T16:53:00.005-04:00

atanga secondary school:

To date, support from Schools for Schools has helped Atanga with some of its highest priorities. Previously there was one school building that was built in 1983, which consisted of four incomplete and severely damaged classrooms. Bricks were broken around the non-existent windows, and there was no plaster or verandas. There were also no doors, preventing the classrooms from being secure at night. The average classroom consisted of 50-60 students per teacher with an average of four students per desk. Some classes were being held in storerooms. The latrines were waterlogged due to poor drainage and posed a great health risk.

With your support we constructed two dual classroom blocks, renovated the four classrooms, supplied them with furniture and a basic supply of textbooks, and refurbished an administration block. We have also drilled a new borehole, replacing the old one that was located downhill from the latrines and posed a risk for contamination. An additional two blocks of five-stance of eco-san latrines have been completed and a generator has been installed to provide a secure and regular power supply. We have also continued to invest in teacher training, including school development planning, monitoring and evaluation, psychosocial support for guidance, and counseling teachers. Furthermore, we provide training for financial management and planning, record keeping, and computer literacy programs.

Work is currently underway for the construction of two additional blocks of eco-san latrines. Underground cabling is being laid to connect the recently supplied generator to all the classrooms and other facilities. These projects will complement the two-story administration block that we will break ground on in the upcoming months.

awere secondary school:

Awere Secondary School was founded in 1982 and has since spent 17 years at a displaced location. Many of the 890 students live in Internally Displaced Persons (IDP) camps and walk miles upon miles to attend school every day. Some students live in hostels while others live with friends or relatives, leaving their families for the opportunity to receive education. A large percentage of the students are orphans, formally abducted LRA soldiers, or child mothers, and several suffer from HIV/AIDS. The facilities and infrastructure at the temporary site in Awere are inadequate and in disrepair. The classrooms are constructed out of split logs and wire, providing no protection from wind, dust, and rain. Termites infest the wood, there are no sturdy walls and the dirt floors become extremely muddy in the rainy season and dusty in the dry season. Awere’s original site is deep in the jungles of northern Uganda, and only a few bare structures remain.

We have completed three fully furnished classroom blocks at the school’s original site since the first round of Schools for Schools. A much needed laboratory block has been constructed and accompanying equipment supplied. A motorized borehole now supplies the entire school with clean water and all of the buildings on campus now benefit from a generator and wiring system providing a regular and safe power supply.
A limited amount of core texts and scholastic materials have been delivered, with more books and sports equipment on the way. We have also been able to assist the staff by supplying them with a limited number of textbooks and by arranging teacher trainings, psychosocial support for guidance counselors, financial management, record keeping and computer literacy trainings. We are currently finalizing the plans for a girls’ dormitory to be built, which we hope to complete using funds from Rounds III and IV. To augment the work that S4S has implemented, the dedicated Head Teacher Mr. Matthew Ottober has mobilized the school community to invest in the construction of an admin block and the beginnings of on-site teachers housing.

[http://www.invisiblechildren.com/theMission/schools_for_schools]

the war continues.

2009-09-03T15:38:00.003-04:00

http://washingtontimes.com/news/2009/sep/03/rebel-group-wreaks-havoc-across-africa/?page=3

some good news though...

even in this war, there is hope.

a post by the organization, Invisible Children:

Anaka Secondary School was built in 1965, approximately 35 miles from Gulu. In 1996, Anaka was displaced from its original location due to the conflict. There are currently 916 students enrolled at Anaka. The school recently began providing housing to 290 students, 105 of whom are girls. Approximately 80% of its students come from the surrounding internally displaced persons (IDP) camps. Most of the students and staff have been greatly affected by the war. Many students are orphans, former child soldiers, or girls who have been abducted and molested or raped by the LRA. The school is continually working to provide counseling and outlets for its traumatized students. However, only one of the five guidance counselors has received training.

Due to the displacement of the school in 1996, the original site needed a massive overhaul. There were cracks in the walls and floors, poor foundations, broken windows and open roofs. All of the classrooms at Anaka were in need of total renovation or demolition. Based on our research, the student-classroom ratio was 115:1. A lack of textbooks or a school library contributed to very poor reading levels. Anaka’s original site had no electricity, no latrines and only one borehole, which is used by the neighboring IDP camp and can provide only enough water for ¼ of the student population.

With support from S4S and the local District Education Office, Anaka successfully returned to its original site in February of 2009. Their return home signifies a huge step forward for the community. An improvement in attendance and punctuality has been attributed to the excitement of holding lessons in the new classrooms. To date, we have been able to build three blocks of dual classrooms and 24-stances of latrines, as well as drill a new borehole, provide adequate classroom furniture for the new classrooms, purchase a small amount of necessary textbooks and reference books, art supplies, and sports equipment and some basic laboratory equipment. We have also been able to provide the staff with training in many areas, including teaching techniques, financial management, computer literacy, and evaluation and psychosocial support.

2009-08-30T19:21:00.002-04:00

"my dear brothers, take note of this: everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires."

james 1:19-20

"submit to one another out of reverence for Christ."

ephesians 5:21

work in me, Lord.

Holy Spirit, bring me Your peace.

i am thankful.

2009-08-29T12:03:00.003-04:00

i have a wonderful family,

such sweet friends,

and an amazing boy.

last night was more than i could've ever asked for.

2009-08-28T09:31:00.003-04:00

i am anxious.

tonight is opening night for my photo exhibit.

my parents will be there.

my friends will be there.

strangers will be there.

i just hope everything goes well.

i hope people enjoy themselves.

i hope i'm not this anxious all day long.

the people of gainesville are beautiful.

2009-08-26T16:20:00.002-04:00

there's something about the people here.

the one's who have spent their lives in this small town.

growing as a community.

loving all.

even those of us who come and go every 4 years or so.

i am very thankful for this place and its people.

especially the wards community : )

from the imitation of christ.

2009-08-25T22:29:00.002-04:00

[God wants you to learn to endure troubles without comfort, to submit yourself totally to him, and to become more humble through adversity.]

[And the more we progress in the spiritual life, the heavier our crosses will be, for the pain of our separation from God increases in proportion to our love of God.]

[And the more a person's body is weakened by affliction, the more his spirit is strengthened by inner grace.]

[To endure the kingdom of God, we must endure many hardships.]

help me to see my faults.

encourage me to grow in virtue.

let my sinfulness always displease me.

help me to willingly embrace every hardship and bitterness.

[Neither does a person show enough courage, who caves in to despair at the time of adversity, thinking thoughts and harboring feelings that show less trust in me than he should.]

2009-08-24T16:22:00.001-04:00

help me.

help me to hold this loosely.

so loosely.

to love You.

not myself.

to seek Your guidance.

to seek Your light.

to feel the Spirit.

to listen to the Spirit.

draw me close to You, Father.

psalm 143.

2009-08-24T08:48:00.002-04:00

o Lord, hear my prayer,
listen to my cry for mercy;
in Your faithfulness and righteousness
come to my relief.
do not bring Your servant into judgement,
for no one living is righteous before You.

the enemy pursues me,
he crushes me to the ground;
he makes me dwell in darkness
like those long dead.
so my spirit grows faint within me;
my heart within me is dismayed.

i remember the days of long ago;
i meditate on all Your works
and consider what Your hands have done.
i spread out my hands to You;
my soul thirsts for You like a parched land.

selah.

answer me quickly, o Lord;

my spirit fails.

do not hide Your face from me

or i will be like those who go down to the pit.

let the morning bring me word of Your unfailing love,

for i have put my trust in You.

show me the way i should go,

for to You i lift up my soul.

rescue me from my enemies,

o Lord,

for i hide myself in You.

teach me to do Your will,

for You are my God;

may your good Spirit

lead me on level ground.

for Your name's sake, o Lord, preserve my life;

in Your righteousness, bring me out of trouble.

in Your unfailing love, silence my enemies;

destroy all my foes,

for i am Your servant.

hotel cafe musicians.

2009-08-10T13:47:00.003-04:00

a little reminding is nice sometimes:

2009-08-07T21:51:00.004-04:00

"The sinner is accepted before he pleads for mercy.

It is already granted.

He need only receive it.

Total amnesty.

Gratuitous pardon."

-Brennan Manning
the ragamuffin gospel: visual edition

i enjoy awkwardness.

2009-08-06T11:07:00.000-04:00

a morning prayer.

2009-08-06T10:17:00.002-04:00

Lord, i've been feeling really helpless lately.
i feel alone.
i feel frustrated. restless. tired.

i know that You are here with me.
i know that You will never leave nor forsake me.

and i believe that You are using this time in my life to teach me something.
because You are good.

i believe that You are trying to show me something.
because You are good.

i don't want to strive to figure out what Your purposes are.
i just want to trust that Your will is being worked out through me.
because You are good.

i want to be one with You.

i desire to be filled with the Spirit.
pouring out of me the light and love that i do not have on my own.

help me to take deep breaths.
help me to trust You.

You are good.
and for that, i am thankful.

2009-08-05T18:44:00.002-04:00

cath...

2009-08-04T19:27:00.003-04:00

cath, she stands
with a well intentioned man
but she can't relax
with his hand on the small of her back
and as the flash bulbs burst
she holds a smile
like someone would hold
a crying child

and soon everybody will ask
what became of you
'cause your heart was dying fast
and you didn't know what to do

cath, it seems
that you live in someone else's dream
[that you live in a dying dream]
in a hand-me-down wedding dress
with the things that could've been are repressed
[on the arm of a man you detest]

but you said your vows
and you closed the door
on so many men
who would have loved you more

and soon everybody will ask
what became of you
'cause your heart was dying fast
and you didn't know what to do

the whispers that it won't last
run up and down the pews
but if their hearts were dying that fast
they'd have done the same as you

and I'd have done the same as you

-death cab for cutie.

i'm anxious.

2009-08-03T10:53:00.003-04:00

i don't want to be.
but, that rarely changes the fact that i am.

i want to get away.
from everyone.

i want to be done with this part of my life.
i want change.

i'm not content.

i'm prideful.
and angry.
and jealous.
and sad.
and lonely.
and weak.
i am tired, Lord.

i need Your grace.
and Your help.

["...for i seek not to please myself but him who sent me." - John 5:30]

Lord, i have no clue what Your will is, but i pray that it would be done.
lead me. and help me to desire only You.
grant me peace, Lord.

2009-08-02T20:27:00.003-04:00

i assume that Heschel's prayer from my last post comes somewhat from this poem.

'As Kingfishers Catch Fire'
by Gerard Manley Hopkins

AS kingfishers catch fire, dragonflies dráw fláme;
As tumbled over rim in roundy wells
Stones ring; like each tucked string tells, each hung bell’s
Bow swung finds tongue to fling out broad its name;
Each mortal thing does one thing and the same:	5
Deals out that being indoors each one dwells;
Selves—goes itself; myself it speaks and spells,
Crying Whát I do is me: for that I came.

Í say móre: the just man justices;
Kéeps gráce: thát keeps all his goings graces;	10
Acts in God’s eye what in God’s eye he is—
Chríst—for Christ plays in ten thousand places,
Lovely in limbs, and lovely in eyes not his
To the Father through the features of men’s faces

2009-08-01T01:03:00.005-04:00

lately, i have been trying to gather my thoughts for an artist statement.
in the fall, my roommate and i will have an exhibit up in a local coffee shop.
the two of us traveled around europe a bit this summer and have some photographs we'd like to share.

i haven't really sat down and tried to write an artist statement,
because i don't think i can. at least not yet.
so, whenever i come across words or statements that speak to me, i write them down.

over the weeks, i've tried to collect my random thoughts and various pieces of text,
in hopes of putting together some kind of statement.

sometimes i find it rather silly that i have to write an artist statement.
i don't really know how to explain myself or my photography.
i don't know how to put in words what draws me to a particular moment
that makes me want to capture it.

but, no matter how difficult words and reason may seem to me,
i have been told that i must have this artist statement.

thankfully, i came across a prayer today when i was reading some more of the ragamuffin gospel.
somewhere in the middle of the book, manning shares a prayer of rabbi abraham joshua heschel.
and it's a prayer that, i feel, does a really wonderful job of putting into words what i feel.

"dear Lord, grant me the grace of wonder. surprise me, amaze me, awe me in every crevice of your universe. delight me to see how your Christ plays in ten thousand places, lovely in limbs, and lovely in eyes not His, to the Father through the features of men's faces. each day enrapture me with Your marvelous things without number. i do not ask to see the reason for it all; i ask only to share the wonder of it all."

summer is almost over.

2009-07-30T19:19:00.004-04:00

this summer's been pretty fast-paced.
i've done a lot of traveling. a lot of living out of a bag.
but, i'm back in gainesville.
and the days are slowing down.

today, i intended to spend most of my time reading and writing.
of course, that didn't happen.

after waking up late,
cleaning/organizing my laundry room/closet,
catching up with a few friends,
cleaning up my house,
and hanging out with roommates,

i finally sat down to read.

i've been reading the ragamuffin gospel: visual edition for a little while now. i think i like just reading a couple of pages at a time. i don't want to rush through it. something in me wants to save a little bit for each time that i pick it up.

here's some stuff from today that i think i'll sit with for a while:

"to be human is to be poor. our impoverished spirit gives us pause before we decide to become tyrants to ourselves."

"repentance is not what we do in order to earn forgiveness; it is what we do because we have been forgiven."

2009-07-25T19:39:00.002-04:00

sleeping at last has a new album.
everyone should get it.
or at least give it a listen.

their lyrics are always beautiful.

2009-07-08T21:03:00.002-04:00

let only love flow from me.
let my words only be praises to You.

help me to be patient.
help me to know You more.

let Your will be done.

help me to move away from worldly things and toward You.

i do not belong to this world.
my home is with You.

the practice of the presence of God.

2009-06-26T20:37:00.001-04:00

"He requires no great matters of us:
a little remembrance of Him from time to time;
a little adoration;
sometimes to pray for His grace,
sometimes to offer Him your sufferings,
and sometimes to return Him thanks for the favors He has given you,
and still gives you, in the midst of your troubles,
and to console yourself with Him the oftenest you can.

lift up your heart to Him,
sometimes even at your meals,
and when you are in company;
the least little remembrance will always be acceptable to Him.

you need not cry very loud;
He is nearer to us than we are aware of.

it is not necessary for being with God to be always at church.
we may make an oratory of our heart wherein to retire from time to time
to converse with Him in meekness, humility and love.

every one is capable of such familiar conversation with God,
some more, some less.

He knows what we can do.
let us begin, then.

perhaps He expects but one generous resolution on our part.

have courage.

let us live and die with God.

suffering will be sweet and pleasant to us while we are with Him;
and the greatest pleasures will be, without Him, a cruel punishment to us.

may He be blessed for all.

amen."

~brother lawrence.