the quiet of our own being.

[It is useless to try to make peace with ourselves by being pleased with everything we have done. In order to settle down in the quiet of our own being we must learn to be detached from the results of our own activity. We must withdraw ourselves, to some extent, from effects that are beyond our control and be content with the good will and the work that are the quiet expression of our inner life. We must be content to live without watching ourselves live, to work without expecting an immediate reward, to love without an instantaneous satisfaction, and to exist without any special recognition.

Our Christian destiny is, in fact, a great one: but we cannot achieve greatness unless we lose all interest in being great. For our own idea of greatness is illusory, and if we pay too much attention to it we will be lured out of the peace and stability of the being God gave us, and seek to live in a myth we have created for ourselves. It is, therefore, a very great thing to be little, which is to say: to be ourselves. And when we are truly ourselves we lose most of the futile self-consciousness that keeps us constantly comparing ourselves with others in order to see how big we are.]

-thomas merton.

You are with me.

psalm 23.

the Lord is my shepherd.

i shall not want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures.

He leads me beside quiet waters.

He restores my soul.

He guides me in paths of righteousness

for His name's sake.

even though i walk through the valley of the shadow of death

i will fear no evil,

for You are with me.

Your rod and staff,

they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me,

in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil.

my cup overflows.

surely goodness and love will follow me

all the days of my life.

and i will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

wedding ideas. part 7.

a beautiful dress:

hoping we can find a tandem to ride away on!:

the bottom picture has some cute birds on the table:

i really like the dessert set-up for all of the various pies and desserts we'll have:

(i don't know if i like the word "sweet")

oh and i really like her little sweater that she has on for the reception.

love the tree stumps, cool bottles & vases, and assortment of flowers:

love this dresser/table with the flower set-up:

really love the little canvas bags with that design.

and we're going to need to clothespin some photos everywhere:

love the books as centerpieces:

love the old drawers to hold the silverware:

would love to find a typewriter to use as the guest book:

some more wonderful decorations (like the windows hanging):

[ in order to defend ourselves against agitation, we must be detached not only from the immediate results of our work - and this detachment is difficult and rare - but from the whole complex of aims that govern our earthly lives. we have to be detached from health and security, from pleasures and possessions, from people and places and conditions and things. we have to be indifferent to life itself, in the Gospel sense, living like the lilies of the field, seeking first the Kingdom of Heaven and trusting that all our material needs will be taken care of into the bargain. ]

thomas merton.

no man is an island.

a reminder of things.

all excerpts/thoughts/notes from No Man is an Island by Thomas Merton:

[the life of the interior self is so often smothered under the ashes of anxiety and futile concern.

without a life of the spirit, our whole existence becomes unsubstantial and illusory.

anxiety is the mark of spiritual insecurity. a far worse insecurity comes from being afraid to ask the right questions.

the discovery of Christ is never genuine if it is nothing but a flight from ourselves.

to live in hope is to live in poverty, having nothing.

hope deprives us of everything that is not God, in order that all things may serve their true purpose as means to bring us to God.

it is better to find God on the threshold of despair than to risk our lives in a complacency that has never felt the need of forgiveness.

what is most important: to see the value and the beauty in ordinary things, to come alive to the splendor that is all around us in the creatures of God.

the man who can face such dryness and abandonment for a long time, with great patience, and ask nothing more of God but to do His holy will and never offend Him, finally enters into pure prayer.

pure prayer only takes possession of our hearts for good when we no longer desire any special light or grace or consolation for ourselves, and pray without any thought of our own satisfaction.]

to be continued...

dream life.

a photo shoot by the wonderful, tec petaja.

if only those images were my life...

wedding ideas. part 6.

i'm hoping to find a simple dress. and i'd like to make a flower belt like this to go with it.

love this big open feel.

LOVE these shoes. i'm hoping to find a pair of cute yellow flats to wear.

i've seen this idea a lot and i really like it. i'm hoping to pin up a bunch of photos of us, along with our friends and family.

i like using these buckets as centerpieces. and maybe for the flower girl.

just another cute photo with a mason jar.

hoping to find a bunch of these to use for centerpieces and drinking glasses.

[kenda, how crazy is this! i can't believe someone else had those pencils in their wedding.]

also, i'd love to have jugs of sweet tea and lemonade.

two or three things i know for sure.

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that everyone has a story.

a story worth telling.

a story worth listening to.

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that empowerment and affirmation

can only be found within yourself.

your identity is not found in the labels

the world has stitched into your clothes.

and it is not contained to the boxes the world has limited you to.

your identity is your own.

and it runs across borders.

it deconstructs labels and reconstructs truth.

it blurs the lines of boxes.

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that when you withhold love from others,

you are only hurting yourself.

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that life is not about the body.

it is not about the skin we are in.

but, it is about the heart.

the spirit.

the soul.

all of which are always trying to find their way home. to Love.

there are two or three things i know for sure,

and one is that Love wins. always.

even when the dark gets darker.

even when the Light seems to have faded away.

even when you can't even remember what Hope feels like.

what Faith feels like.

even when the world's illusion of power becomes overwhelming.

even when you feel smothered by the lies of society.

Love wins.

always.

for giving.

i've been re-reading "traveling mercies" by anne lamott,

and man is it breaking me. again.

here's some stuff from the chapter "forgiveness."

[if you want to be forgiven, if you want to experience that kind of love,

you have to forgive everyone in your life -- everyone, even the very worst boyfriend you ever had -- even, for God's sake, yourself.

forgiveness means that God is for giving,

and that we are here for giving too,

and that to withhold love or blessings is to be completely delusional.

God loves us exactly the way we are,

and God loves us too much to let us stay like this.

i read once in some magazine that in czechoslovakia, they say an echo in the woods always returns your own call, and so i started speaking sweetly to everyone ... and my sweet voice started getting all over me, like sunlight ... ]

[the salvation of the righteous comes from the Lord;

He is their stronghold in time of trouble.

the Lord helps them and delivers them;

He delivers them from the wicked and saves them,

because they take refuge in Him.]

-psalm 37:40

wedding ideas. part 5: some more cute things.

i just like old windows used as decoration:

some more flower arrangements that i like:

mason jars hanging from trees, again. i just can't get enough:

maybe some homemade jam & apple butter for gifts:

my most favorite wedding (photos) ever.

http://blog.benblood.com/2010/03/22/emilycolby-a-wild-west-wedding/

here's some photos, but you should check out this link to see them all.

the wedding is absolutely incredible.

and the photography is the best i've ever seen.

wedding ideas. part 4: things and such cont'd.

this is a must. i LOVE this idea:

a nest ring pillow:

possible cake toppers?...

i'm trying to find the perfect center piece. we want everything in our wedding to be of some other use. i like this idea. a lot.

here's another wedding with a tree as the centerpiece:

wedding ideas. part 3: the attire.

the dress - some of my favorite finds so far:

i like the sheer material. and layers.

i like these straps, the lace, and slender design.

i like this one the most. i'm just still not sure if i want a short or long dress.

lace is always elegant.

matching socks for the boys...so cute.

wedding ideas. part 2: things and such.

i love this table setting:

maybe everyone can donate tableware for the night:

mason jars with flowers and tea lights, hanging from the trees is a must:

i like when the inside is out:

maybe we could find a quaint, old door for an entry way:

a bouquet of lavender would be quite nice:

or this one:

wedding ideas. part 1: location.

hoping for a location somewhat like this:

or this:

or this:

and for the reception, something like this... maybe:

or this:

(and leaving on a tandem would be perfect.)